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Saturday, August 18, 2012

Back to School Tip #6: Reacting Rather Than Responding

Here's a couple of basic stress model principles to remember when you find yourself reacting rather than responding to your child. Remember that you are reacting from your unconscious. You are coming from a place of fear rather than love. This is fairly simple to overcome. First of all, slow down and think. Allow you to take several deep breaths and relax. You can then connect with your child and help him regulate. Even after you react, you can stop and create the space to respond. Continue to do your own work around your emotional trauma so when it gets triggered you can respond rather than react. *Adapted from 10 Important Back-to-School Tips for Parents and Teachers - Heather T. Forbes, LCSW If you find yourself needing additional support and encouragement to advocate for your child, contact me for a FREE 30 minute phone consult when you subscribe to my weekly Christian Parent Wisdom http://bit.ly/nmOEXw and mention that you heard about this FREE offer though this blog on your subscription order. I offer more school strategies and resources in my July 2012 Love in Action Newsletter - Back to School Resources at http://bit.ly/nNyPn6

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Back to School Tip #5: Understand What Your Child iews as a Threat*

Many times adults lose track of their child=s perspective. Understanding your child=s perspective is all part of meeting your child where they are. This has to do with understanding and validating their reality. What you perceive as being safe may or may not be safe to your child. Help your child put words to what is not safe. Connect with your child and without asking a lot of questions encourage them to talk about their day at school. Your child may not use the word threat or fearful when describing situations. Listen for words like hard, not liking, and even adjectives like stupid or lame. These words may be your child=s cognitive renditions of an underlying fear or threat. If your child says he Adoesn’t=t know@ use a short social story to describe what you think your child may be experiencing. You can then work with your child and teacher and develop an effective strategy to help your child feel safe. *Adapted from 10 Important Back-to-School Tips for Parents and Teachers - Heather T. Forbes, LCSW If you find yourself needing additional support and encouragement to advocate for your child, contact me for a FREE 30 minute phone consult when you subscribe to my weekly Christian Parent Wisdom http://bit.ly/nmOEXw and mention that you heard about this FREE offer though this blog on your subscription order. I offer more school strategies and resources in my July 2012 Love in Action Newsletter - Back to School Resources at http://bit.ly/nNyPn6