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Saturday, November 12, 2011

Are You Worthy?

This may seem like a very odd or unusual question. If the answer is no or you doubt this about yourself, it will be a challenge along your parenting journey. November is Nation Adoption Awareness Month. My work focuses on helping families have successful adoptions. The definition of a successful adoption is probably as varied as the number of families with adopted chidlren. An essential ingredient for a successful adoption is how parents feel about themselves. In the DVD - Trauma, Brain & Relationship - Helping Children Heal, Judyth O. Weaver, PhD, Santa Barbara Graduate Institute says that “We need to work with parents who can feel good enough about themselves so that they can allow their children to feel good enough...” Feeling good about yourself is defined by your self worth or self definition. These definitions are a function of shame. Shame is a self defeating belief that we are not worthy, not good enough, and don’t measure up. Shame is a belief of being inherently flawed and therefore undeserving of any success or happiness. I encourage you to take a hard look at yourself and explore shame in your life. Not sure what shame is? Find out by reading October, 2011 Love in Action Newsletter “What Exactly is Shame?”Go to

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Challenge of Adoption - Never Give Up

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. With it comes the mention of the negative aspects of adoption. The story about the parents who returned their adopted children to Russia has re-surfaced. Unfortunately, there are failed adoptions. Most any parent whose child has challenging behaviors has reached the end of their rope. This can also happen with parents whose children may not have these challenging behaviors. Where does a parent find hope? The only true and consistent source of hope comes from Jesus Christ. Jesus never gives up on us. As hard as that may be, that is what is expected of us as parents. I recently heard a teaching sermon on this that really spoke to me. It is by Brian Zahn, Word of Life Church, St. Joseph, MO. Pastor Zahn narrates the story of Peter as told by John in John 21. Jesus never gave up on Peter, even after Peter forsake him. Jesus never gives up on us or our chidlren. We have to draw on our faith to allow Jesus to work in and through us so that we never give up. Humanly impossible? Yes, without Jesus. Jesus prays that Peter’s “faith may not fail” him, Luke 22:32. Parent with courage and strength from the Holy Spirit. To listen to or download the pod cast of Brian Zahn’s sermon, go to Sunday, October, 30, 2011