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Saturday, June 16, 2012

Being a Father - Tip #5

Reverse negative neurological feedback loops.

You can reverse negative feedback loops by interrupting your child’s stress cycle. This will help you connect with your child. Begin by exploring what is contributing to the negative neurological feedback loops within the family. You need to identify your negative reactions to your child’s behavior. Begin to understand what in your past triggers this negative reaction. Understanding this is critical in developing secure attachments with children. You need to have an understanding of your own childhood attachments. Your own history of attachments and relationships is the blueprint you follow. Until this blueprint is changed you will continue to perpetuate negative neurological feedback loops within the family.

Looking for more information? Get "The Great Behavior Breakdown" by Bryan Post

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Being a Father #4

Be slow to anger and quick to listen and forgive

James 1:19-21tells us to be “quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,” and ready to forgive (my paraphrase of verse 21). I recently found a new perspective for forgiveness. The Daily Word (paraphrased), April 18, 2012 thought for the day: “I give the gift of forgiveness for the blessing of peace of mind.” Forgive is the combination of the words give and for. Ask yourself what you would be willing to give for peace of mind. Would you be willing to give up pain and anger to enjoy a better life? How about giving up judgment or criticism of your past for freedom to live in loving ways? This gives forgiveness a whole new powerful perspective.

"Be kind to one another . . ., forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you."
Ephesians 4:32

To find our more on forgiveness, read my August & September 2011 Love in Action Newsletters