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Sunday, October 12, 2014

10-20-10 Builds Relationships With Your Children

Every parent/child relationship can be strengthened by following my 10-20-10 formula.

Here’s how it works: Parents make special opportunities to be with their child following my 10-20-10 method. Simply put, this means to spend 10 minutes in the morning, 20 minutes in the afternoon, and 10 minutes in the evening with your child. These are special opportunities to be with your child:  just listen without judging, blaming, or shaming. Validate whatever your child is saying and feeling.

Validation does not mean you agree with their opinion. Validation means that you are listening to your child. By doing this, families can start to start to repair their broken relationship. This improved relationship then goes towards influencing the child to make more responsible decisions and demonstrate respect.

Jesus said in Luke 18:16 to "let the children come to me." This is Godly advice for parents. Jesus was a safe place for children. Parents need to strive to be a safe place for their children.


Ken Thom, MS, LPC is a nationally recognized Christian counselor and writer. He is available for parent and individual coaching. Ken is a Post Institute Certified Family Regulatory Therapist, Certified Coach and Great Behavior Breakdown Instructor as well as a certified BCI parent trainer. Ken's book Christian Parent Wisdom is a daily scripture based medication book for parenting children with challenging behaviors. Contact Ken.