Families are deteriorating. The
result of this deterioration is chronic problems for children. Children always
suffer when they lose their secure base. The secure base in the home is not
just dependent on one parent. Unfortunately, that seems to be the case in more
and more families.
Ephesians 5:22-33, is a very
tough set of passages. Husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved
the church. The picture that is painted for husbands is very clear. I didn’t
say easy, I said clear.
In the same passage, wives are
called to submit to and respect their husbands. The word ‘submit’ creates a lot
of fear because it is misinterpreted. Do your own research. Submit does not
mean less than. I like what the Message Bible says: “Wives, understand and
support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ.” After all,
didn’t Christ submit to his father?
The Trinity says that God,
Jesus, and the Holy Spirit are one and the same. A discussion of this type can
become very complicated. We can easily get sidetracked. Since I’m not a
theologian, I’m going to avoid a complicated discussion that could come out of
this. I need to keep things simple.
I can easily connect this to the stress model. Loving your wife becomes fearful. Supporting and respecting your
husband becomes fearful. Fear takes us out of being in a love state.
Simply put, work toward staying
in a state of love. This is the individual responsibility of the husband. This
is the individual responsibility of the wife. When this happens, all the other
“stuff” goes away. We don’t have to worry about submission or respect. Love
just begins to happen.
***
Ken Thom , MS
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