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Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Good Stress Needs Regulation Too

Too many times we forget that good stress can cause dys-regulation too. Children as well as adults can get over simulated and have meltdowns. This kind of dys-regulation can be easily miss-understood as lack of appreciation or being self centered. I have heard parents respond by saying, “Well you had a good time and got what you wanted, isn’t that enough?” The problem is that it is usually more than enough emotional stimulation. Your child truly appreciates the party or fun time with his or her friends. Dys-regulation is dys-regulation regardless of good or bad stress. Dys-regulation causes confused and distorted thinking. The amygdala is aroused and oxytocin response is shut down. Result - TEMPER TANTRUM - for a seeming positive event. More than likely the parent is also over simulated and doesn’t realize that he or she is close to exceeding their window of tolerance. Try making your child’s world a little smaller and giving them Christmas excitement in smaller portions. Let the love and oxytocin flow through the holidays. Are you having difficulty as a parent slowing down and regulating? Get help learning to relax with one of my relaxation CDS @

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