Play-in the snow, at home, a game! The number one way kids communicate is through play. Everyone feels less stressed when they are playing. Maybe it’s doing a puzzle or playing a board game. Maybe it’s setting up a video game tournament with everyone in the house…parents included! Perhaps you love playing outside…go sledding or skiing or snow boarding.

Try to be in the moment with your child and our family. Do you wake up thinking of all the things you have to get accomplished-“I have to get this laundry done, I need to clean this room, I have to vacuum, I need to clean the bathrooms”…this list goes on and on. This moment will only be here right now. Be flexible in your expectations of yourself, your loved ones, and your home. It really is more important to spend time with your children and be present with them than for them to have the cleanest room on the block.

Spend extra cuddle or hug time together. Are you the type of person who likes hugs or shies away from hugs? Most kids loved to be hugged…even if they are teenagers! All kids need to know that they are loved and hugging is one of the best ways to do this. Hugging your loved one can send them a message of love and acceptance, of security and safety.

Create a special ritual that’s just something you do in your own family. Maybe you go for a walk every evening or read a special book to each other. Maybe you have a secret handshake or sing a special song. Ask your kids what they want to do. Maybe you call a new family member each day of the week. Perhaps you talk about your dreams or wishes each night before you go to sleep. Rituals give kids structure and structure helps kids feel safe. Once kids feel safe, negative behaviors decrease and positive behaviors bloom

Be of service and teach your child to be a servant. Give to others. This season is about giving to others. One of the best strategies to do this is to teach children how to give to others. Color a picture, make a craft project, donate used toys, or volunteer. Many people are in need of something and sometimes knowing that others are in need helps us put perspective in our own lives.

Laughter is great medicine. I have never once had an experience where I got finished laughing and thought, “I’m so bummed I just did that. I never want to laugh again.” That just seems silly, doesn’t it? So often, as parents, we are caught up in controlling things and trying to manage behavior, we forget to laugh. Rent a funny movie. Play a funny game. Tell each other funny stories. Tell a good joke. This will help you and your children laugh. Do whatever it takes for you to laugh!

Cook together and eat as a family. Let the children have some control over the menu and making the table look festival. It’s true, food really can bring people together. Let his holiday season be a time of bringing your family together. Yes, the dinner table may be chaotic. Yes, kids will refuse to eat. Yes, you will want them to eat and may be frustrated. Focus on the togetherness and not on the eating. Focus on listening to the rhythm of your own house. Ask your child what happened in his/her day. Share what happened in yours.