If you think back on your own childhood, do you remember the
things that your father bought you or activities that you did together. I think
we all remember going fishing, camping, playing catch, etc.
Now is the time to make the decision to increase the quality
time that you spend with your children.
I recommend that you learn and utilize the 10-20-10 strategy,
which is a simple formula to follow.
You spend 10 minutes in the morning, 20
minutes in the afternoon, and 10 minutes in the evening with your children.
These opportunities are simply to listen and not judge, blame, or shame. You
need to validate what your children are saying and feeling. Validation does not
mean that you agree with what they are saying and feeling, but you are
listening and hearing them.
Spending less than an hour each day listening to your
children can begin to repair broken relationships. Repairing relationships
allows you to help influence your children to start making more responsible
decisions while also demonstrating respect.
So, tomorrow, begin using the 10-20-10 strategy and remember
to listen.
***
Ken Thom, MS, LPC is a
nationally recognized Christian counselor and writer. He is available for
parent and individual coaching. Ken is a Post Institute Certified Family
Regulatory Therapist, Certified Coach and Great Behavior Breakdown Instructor
as well as a certified BCI parent trainer. Ken's book Christian Parent Wisdom is a daily scripture based medication book for parenting
children with challenging behaviors. Contact Ken.
